Matthew 18:21-23
21Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?"
22Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.[a]
23"Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants.
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I've been thinking about my brother and his current incarceration. He's sitting in jail waiting to serve a 20 month sentence on posession of drug making chemicals. This isn't his first felong - it's his third.
It breaks my heart in a million pieces when I think about him behind bars. I find it so hard to go and visit him because I seem to cry all the time and nearly sob when I see him being led away by the guards.
I do not visit him often in jail.
Now the discussion with my mother about him is what he'll do when he gets out. He's always saying what he thinks we want to hear from him while he's in jail. He tells/writes a totally different thing to his buddies; complete opposite of what he tells us. We know this because mother found a stash of letters written to his current addict girlfriend the last time he got out about 3 months ago. The letters were discouraging to say the least.
So, now we are at a point of making decisions. Should he parole he needs an address to use. There is no one to offer that to him except me and my hubby. I find myself not wanting to help him again because of how many times he has lied and hurt us.
That's where I am with forgiving him and trusting him. I'm working actively on the forgiveness but I don't know that I can ever trust him.
Lord, I need your help here.
Mar
